Top 7 Things Lynne Spears Should Be Told

As most of you have probably heard by now, Jamie Lynn Spears, star of Nickelodeon’s Zoey 101 and sister to train wreck pop superstar Britney Spears, is pregnant. The 16-year-old singer/actress announced her pregnancy in an exclusive interview with OK! Magazine.

With sister Britney not exactly the poster child for motherhood, I imagine a lot of people are thinking evil of their mother, Lynne Spears. I don’t know what is going through Lynne’s head, but I can think of seven things she should be told asap.

7. Your daughters need protection, so step to it! And I don’t mean rubbers. Your daughters are idolized by millions; they’re going to be under attack from all sides, including, unfortunately, many judgmental folks in the church. If there’s any time that you have to be there for them, it’s now. It could be a lot worse: if Jamie Lynn were Filipina, her boyfriend would be arrested and booked for statutory rape because she’s a minor.

6. It’s okay to cry, just not in public. You must be in a lot of pain with everything happening to both Britney and Jamie Lynn. However, you have to be strong. You’re going to be vilified by the press; the last thing they need to see is a mother who thinks she’s lost control of her daughters and herself. Don’t lose it in public now.

5. Get some good testosterone in on this circus. Pray to find a good strong male influence for the girls. So things didn’t work out with you and James; that doesn’t mean there’s not another good male soul out there who can provide some element of needed-guidance. This is not to say that single moms can’t do it on their own; I’m just saying that every mother needs and deserves help, and having a strong guy around – not necessarily one romantically linked to her – will help.

4. Don’t marry Jamie Lynn off just because. These days, teenage pregnancy is an epidemic, and a shotgun marriage is almost always never the right answer.

3. Jamie Lynn needs to finish her education. Learn from the experience of millions of teenage mothers throughout the years who’ve made names for themselves. Some did it through sheer perseverance; others did it with a bit of luck and an ounce of gumption. I think you’ll find a solid foundation, though, comes from the confidence of and opportunities given to people who have finished their education. It’s not a guarantee, but it makes for a great fall-back if and when the well runs dry.
2. Two words: trust fund.
1. It’s gonna be okay. The world is going to judge you for what your children are going through, but every day is a new day that offers a fresh new opportunity for redemption. Regardless of what the world thinks, the only Judge that matters still loves you and can give you strength. Your daughters and your three grandkids are going to need you to be strong, so chin up!

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